Diminished

You know things are bad when you cry but you don't feel an iota of relief. The tears end but you can't stop screaming. You want to run yourself ragged. You want to punch until your knuckles are raw. You want to vomit until you choke up your intestines.

It's even worse when you have no one to collapse onto.



This is easily the hardest point in my life right now.
I can't talk with anyone about it because I don't want to have them struggle with what to say, what to do. I don't want that for you. All I want is a lap to curl into. All I need is someone who'll smooth my hair away from my face so it doesn't get stuck in the tears. I can't handle this. I'm not strong enough. I can't fucking deal with it alone.